|The Onion. Brilliant.
"My fellow Americans, I am sick and tired of not being president," said Clinton, introducing his wife at a "Hillary '08" rally. "For seven agonizing years, I have sat idly by as others experienced the joys of campaigning, debating, and interacting with the people of this great nation, and I simply cannot take it anymore. I have to be president again. I have to."
"From signing healthcare reform legislation, to working with politicians
from across the aisle, to brokering international peace treaties with foreign
dignitaries, I goddamn love being president," Clinton said. "For too long has
this nation been deprived of a Bill Clinton presidency, and for too long have I
been deprived of being president. Now I get to experience all these wonderful
things again myself."